June 20, 2021: "Changing Our Minds"
June 20, 2021 Changing Our Minds Rhonda Blevins, DMIN
Numbers 27:1-11
Then the daughters of Zelophehad came forward. Zelophehad was son of Hepher son of Gilead son of Machir son of Manasseh son of Joseph, a member of the Manassite clans. The names of his daughters were: Mahlah, Noah, Hoglah, Milcah, and Tirzah. 2 They stood before Moses, Eleazar the priest, the leaders, and all the congregation, at the entrance of the tent of meeting, and they said, 3 “Our father died in the wilderness; he was not among the company of those who gathered themselves together against the Lord in the company of Korah, but died for his own sin; and he had no sons. 4 Why should the name of our father be taken away from his clan because he had no son? Give to us a possession among our father’s brothers.”
5 Moses brought their case before the Lord. 6 And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying: 7 The daughters of Zelophehad are right in what they are saying; you shall indeed let them possess an inheritance among their father’s brothers and pass the inheritance of their father on to them. 8 You shall also say to the Israelites, “If a man dies, and has no son, then you shall pass his inheritance on to his daughter. 9 If he has no daughter, then you shall give his inheritance to his brothers. 10 If he has no brothers, then you shall give his inheritance to his father’s brothers. 11 And if his father has no brothers, then you shall give his inheritance to the nearest kinsman of his clan, and he shall possess it. It shall be for the Israelites a statute and ordinance, as the Lord commanded Moses.”
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David Leaverton was a self-described political operative in Texas. Part of his work included opposition research and targeted campaigns to turn one group of voters against another. He worked to incite fear and anger on the other side. But watching the division grow in our country, and seeing division occasionally erupt into violence, he changed his mind. Moreover, he changed his vocation. Moreover, he changed his whole way of life. He quit his job, sold his house, bought an RV, and set off with his family on a year-long listening quest to all 50 states in America on a mission to help bring unity to America.
Susan Bro was disinterested in politics. She didn’t find much value in the debates of the day and lived a happy, if sheltered life. She thought, for instance, the country was healed of racial issues. Until one day she got a phone call that would change her life. Her daughter had been killed while protesting white supremacy in Charlottesville, Virginia that fateful day when a hate-filled driver plowed into the crowd. He injured several, and killed her. Her name: Heather Heyer. And now Susan, the mother, is an unlikely activist. She works to bring unity to America.
These are two of the stories highlighted in a documentary film called Reunited States.[1]
Father Richard Rohr teaches that the path of transformation is either great love or great suffering . . . and ultimately, that love and suffering are inextricably linked.
David Leaverton deeply loved his country and suffered upon seeing the division grow and occasionally turn violent. This “suffering love” prompted him to change . . . everything. He now regrets some things he did—he thought he had the moral high ground—but he changed his mind.
Susan Bro deeply loved her daughter and suffered upon losing her. This “suffering love” prompted her to change from being politically disengaged to becoming an activist. It’s how she can partially redeem the loss of her daughter. She changed her mind.
Today in our scripture lesson, we meet the five daughters of Zelophehad, Mahlah, Noah, Hoglah, Milcah, and Tirzah, largely unknown and uncelebrated characters from scripture. Today we could study their courage in speaking truth to power . . . These five powerless women approaching Moses and the other leaders requesting—demanding—that they receive their deceased father’s inheritance instead of it going to their uncles. They were bucking the system—women didn’t own property . . . women were property. So I imagine it took great courage for them to stand up for their rights.
But today I want to explore the story from the other end . . . from the vantagepoint of Moses. Moses, upon hearing these women state their case, does not immediately rule. The scripture tells us that, “Moses brought their case before the Lord.” Long story short, the Lord told Moses, “The women are right.” And what we didn’t read in today’s lection, in the book of Joshua we learn that the five daughters of Zelophehad were given land, their father’s inheritance, when the Israelites claimed the Promised Land.
As we explore this story from the vantagepoint of Moses, what I find interesting is this question: what caused Moses to change his mind? The request from the five daughters broke all the norms, all the practices of the day. It bucked custom; it challenged patriarchy. It would empower those who had little power, and would surely make those uncles mad. It would be easier to dismiss the daughters’ request. So what prompted Moses to change his mind, and therefore change the law?
Before we dive into that question, let’s set the story of Moses in context:
· He was raised in Pharoah’s house
· Self-exiled to the wilderness at the age of 40
· Spent 40 years in exile when God called him to lead his people out of Egypt
· Led the Hebrews out of slavery in Egypt and spent 40 years in the wilderness on the way to the Promised Land
Now Moses is nearing the end of his life—he’s close to 120 years old. He’s seen a thing or two in his life. And now he’s seeing yet one more thing he’s never seen—five orphaned daughters demanding their share of their father’s inheritance. He’s hearing something he’s never heard before.
Which brings me to first step on the road to changing our minds . . . step one is listen.
Ernest Hemingway said, “Most people never listen.” Oh, we hear, but usually our hearing has an agenda. Stephen Covey: “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Listening is more than hearing. Listening seeks to understand. Listening requires curiosity. It requires empathy. It requires an open mind.
This is what Moses brought with him that day to the tent of meeting when five women dared to approach him. Instead of shooing them away, instead of dismissing them, instead of feeling threatened by them for challenging the system he established . . . Moses listened. He listened with an open mind. He listened with empathy. He listened with curiosity. He listened not just to hear, but to understand. He didn’t interrupt them, “That’s not how we do it around here.” He heard them, and moreover, he listened.
What if we could all learn to listen a little better?
Remember David Leaverton, the political activist who bought an RV and took off for one year, traveling to every state to listen to people different from himself? He and his wife listened to a black woman, who through her tears, told them about how her daughter was stillborn because she did not get the medical attention that the white woman in the hospital room next to her got. Leaverton and his wife went across the border to Tijuana and listened to a woman who had to flee with her five children or die; she has no idea if her husband is dead or alive. They listened to a black man who told them he could not, would not, talk about reconciliation while a “boot” was on his neck.
As I watched the film, there were times I was surprised that Mr. Leaverton didn’t get defensive. But one rule of listening: you can’t be defensive.
Back to Moses . . . he didn’t get defensive when the daughters approached him, pointing out an injustice in the system he established. Instead, he listened. In fact, he didn’t answer immediately at all, which brings me to the second step on the road to changing our minds . . . step two is discern.
What is discernment? Charles Spurgeon nailed it when he wrote: “Discernment is not a matter of telling the difference between right and wrong; rather it is telling the difference between right and almost right.” Most of us don’t intentionally choose the “wrong,” but I’m not convinced that the vast majority of us usually choose the “best.” The word “discern” comes from the Latin, discernere, which means “separate.” Those who are discerning can separate the good from the better, the better from the best. In terms of wine, some of you can separate or discern the difference between two buck chuck and an expensive wine. I cannot discern that!
Discernment requires a certain amount of emotional discomfort as one wrestles to find a solution. Discernment requires us to leave a space of “knowing” and enter a space of “not knowing.” In our world of quick-fixes where expediency reigns supreme, there are few accolades for the work of long, slow, deliberate discernment.
So Moses does not immediately rule in the case of the disgruntled daughters of Zelophehad. Instead, he takes the matter to the Lord. Out of public view, in the solitude of his prayer closet, Moses holds the tension between knowing what is best—what is right (where he stood before the daughters confronted him), and not knowing (where he found himself after the daughters confronted him.) And in humility, and in the discomfort of not knowing, Moses brought the daughters’ case before the Lord in the spirit of discernment.
What if we could all learn to discern a little better?
Remember Susan Bro, the grieving mother who had to bury her daughter after a hate-filled individual ran her over at a protest? Susan’s grief prompted the work of discernment, and through that discernment she recognized that the incident in Charlottesville, Virginia was not an isolated incident—that it was part of a much larger narrative of division in America—division that doesn’t have to be. That discernment work prompted something in her, which brings me to the third step on the road to changing our minds . . . step three is relinquish.
Susan Bro had to relinquish apathy, as well as a certain measure of selected ignorance, to change—to be transformed into an activist for healing, unity and reconciliation.
What did Moses have to relinquish in order to change his mind? The daughters were challenging his laws, his rules, his norms after all. But in his listening and in his discerning, he heard God tell him that the daughters were right. Moses had to let go of his attachment to his previous way of thinking, which resulted in the laws that followed. The recipe for letting go is thus: one teaspoon of curiosity, two heaping tablespoons of open-mindedness, and one cup of humility. Throw in a dash of faith, and he was able to let go of any attachment to his previous way of thinking, paving the way to justice for the five daughters of Zelophehad.
What if we could all learn to relinquish a little better?
So to recap, here are the three steps on the way to changing our minds:
1. Listen. Not just hear, but listen. Not to respond, but to understand.
2. Discern. Comfortable with discomfort, no quick answers needed. Leaning on wisdom to separate good from better, and better from best.
3. Relinquish. Be ready to abandon old ideas in light of new information. Curiosity, open-mindedness, humility and faith required.
And as we know, Moses changed his mind. The daughters inherited their father’s land.
Back to David Leaverton and Susan Bro. At the end of the documentary, David and his wife invite Susan to their new home in Charlottesville, Virginia. And in a moment of climax, Susan Bro breaks down in tears, confessing to David and his wife that she almost declined their invitation—she did not want to come to their home. “I was so angry with you,” she said to David, “So angry with you for stirring up opposition. But I knew if I would just come and talk to you, I would find a human being on the other side.” You see, she spent a little time researching Mr. Leaverton’s previous work as a political operative. She recognized how his work contributed to the division, the ugliness, the hate that contributed to her daughter’s death. Susan confronted David with this.
I thought surely that David would defend himself. He could have said, “But I’ve spent all this time trying to make up for that! Doesn’t that count for something?” But David sat at table with Susan. He listened. He said, “You connected my involvement in the political system with the murder of your daughter, and I’ve got to wrestle with that.”
That wrestling David said he would do, that’s the work of discernment.
Susan told David and the others at the table, “We have an obligation and a responsibility, once we are awake, to wake up other people. If I do that and they each do that and you guys each do that then we can have a tsunami of change. This is not a political movement. This is . . . a heart movement.”
So my beloved friends, take a moment and think about yourself. Have you become locked into one-way, either-or thinking? Sucked into the “I’m right, they’re wrong” narrative that political operatives (like David used to be) push in ways both overt and covert? If so, are you willing to do the work of listening? Of exposing yourself to viewpoints outside of your echo chamber?
And let me just name, there are so few places and spaces left where we allow ourselves to be challenged and confronted with viewpoints outside our echo chambers. But you know where one of those places happens to be? Right here. The church. This church. We don’t all believe the same, but my friends, we do all bleed the same.
If we as a people can find our way to healing and unity, it must start here.
Can we listen to understand? Can we discern between better and best? Can we relinquish thought patterns in light of what we hear and discern?
If so, we are on the path to changing our minds.
And if we can change our minds, we can change the world.